BY: Janine Mitchell
Change consultant / Changing mindset
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Hello! So yesterday was supposed to be the most miserable day of the year?
I don’t want to focus on this anymore, I want to focus on how this is the start of a new year, the start of a new chapter, the start of a new focus, goal or success. The start of feeling good for no reason.
In this article, I will touch on why we think the way we do and write about how we can start making subtle changes which will ultimately lead to big shifts. I will also provide you with three top practical tips that you can use straight away.
Unfortunately we have a tendency to focus on the negatives, as this is often innate within us. It’s easier to do so, and what better time to do it, right after the festivities, on the most dark days of the year when the weather is grey and dismal.
Even though negative thoughts are like velcro and positive thoughts are like teflon, it doesn’t have to be like this.
I want you to start focussing on what you want, rather than what you don’t want. We find it easier to focus on the lack, rather than what we actually desire, a common example if worrying about having no money, or being concerned about how we are going to pay the bills – guess what you are focusing on…will it go away when you do so, or will you attract more of the same? Unfortunately, it is easier to focus on the negative. With new ways of thinking however, we can actually begin to retrain the brain to think in different ways.
Why do we do this in the first place?
We are a nation wired to feed off negativity, we secretly love it. Turn on the news, it’s negative, open the newspaper, it’s negative, drive past a big crash on the motorway, everyone slows down to fully rubber neck and have a good look *sigh*
Our ancient ancestors were in survival mode 24/7. They were continually living by the hormones of stress. Today we are no longer generally in imminent danger, however too many of us continue to live by the hormones of stress by thinking and feeling in a certain way that keeps us stuck. So when we have a negative thought, this will release a chemical in the brain, e.g. adrenaline or cortisol. Of course, we all need some stress which can be positive and helpful. However if we are constantly living by the hormones of stress, we are literally living in emergency mode the entire time.
Do you think this is good for our bodies? It sure isn’t and what happens as a result? A number of things.
Often people will only meet absolute breaking point before they secure any type of help. Their back is against the wall, so to speak.
For example, experience a stroke, heart attack, stress related illness. By then it can often be too late, leaving the person thinking, why did I not do something sooner? I often say to clients, how much water can a sponge hold before it all comes dripping out?
It is actually easier to sort something out, before it becomes too late. We have to give ourselves a break, and work out what is more important in life.
To finish, I am going to provide three practical tips which will help you shift your focus and get you off automatic, a way you have potentially thought for a long time.
- Practice new breathing habits. Most of us don’t breath properly most of the time, leaving our body’s starved of essential and much needed oxygen. Regular breathing exercises also allows us to slow down, be in the now and get off automatic, our patterns of the past. I want you to focus on your breathing every hour throughout the day. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath in for the count of 4. Then hold this for 4, then breath out for 5. I want you to repeat this five times. You will feel automatically calmer and much more focussed and more refreshed when you have finished.
- Take more time for you in the working day – 30/70. I want you to practice some self care during your working day. Instead of shovelling lunch down at your desk, go for a walk. The former will NOT make you more productive, trust me. Avoid coffee and sugary drinks and drink plenty of water. Take a break, chat to others, get some fresh air. Focus on a 30/70 balance rather than letting work completely consume you.
- Perform a random act of kindness. Do something kind today that will benefit someone else. Make two sandwiches and give one to a homeless person, send an anonymous gift to a friend, give someone a genuine compliment*
*In a recent study which explored the effects of being kind whereby participants were asked to do one kind thing a day, there wellbeing levels were then measured. The results found that people performing random acts of kindness for a week felt less angry, laughed more and felt more energised.
If you are struggling on your own, and need support and guidance now, I can help much quicker than you might think. I am happy to have a chat or you can easily book in to see me by dropping me a message.
Good luck with all the above, and let me know how you get on.
BY: Janine Mitchell
Change consultant / Changing mindset
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My dog has been really unwell recently. So far, my vet bill has come in at £1,500. Luckily the majority of it has been covered by the insurance. Aside from that however,
I haven’t thought twice about handing over my hard cash to the vet, so they can sort out the pooch problems and help get my dog well again. And I doubt neither would you. We pay what we need to, in order to ensure our pets are healthy and well.
When it comes to our own well-being or health however, are we prepared to put in the investment? Do we think nothing of the costs, and put our health first? I think in many cases, we tend not to. We would rather spend our money on seemingly ‘quick fixes’ in the pursuit of happiness. Things such as a football season ticket, a night out, some new clothes, a holiday. These spends might sure feel good at the time. However, unless we work with the route cause of how we are feeling within ourselves, it is unlikely anything is going to change, in the longer term.
Another way of looking at it is this. When you go to the supermarket and buy the weekly shopping, you my buy the essentials such as milk and bread, pick them off the shelf and put them in your trolley.
However, you can’t buy these things off the shelf – confidence, success, self esteem or happiness. These come from somewhere else. They come from the inside out. You will find it highly unlikely to improve these areas of your life from external validation either.
So, we are happy to pay whatever we need to the vet, to ensure our pets are happy and safe. But how do we look after ourselves?
Indecently, those who invest in personal development in whatever shape or form, are those people who succeed and do well in life. They are constantly improving themselves, while helping to eradicate old limiting beliefs that no longer serve them any more.
When will you think about investing in yourself and living the life you want and deserve, instead of the one you dream about?
I work with you on a one-one basis to help you smash through limiting beliefs to enable you to achieve the success that you deserve. I will help and guide you to completely eradicating stress, anxiety and depression amongst other areas. Why suffer for a moment longer, when you don’t have to.
Get in touch to enquire about how I can help you. Don’t suffer in silence.
BY: Janine Mitchell
Change consultant / Change science / Changing mindset
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My weekend with Dr Joe Dispenza (Part 1)
I have had the privilege to see the awesome Dr Joe Dispenza in action four times now! Dr Joe is a neuroscientist and he discusses in user friendly language the science behind how we can rewire the brain and recondition our bodies to make lasting changes.
Dr Joe is an expert in allowing us to understand how we can manifest whatever we want (or don’t want, as is commonly the case) by thought alone.
He takes into account the latest research in biology, chemistry, epigenetic and quantum physics amongst other areas. It is explained how we can get past our conscious and analytical mind to facilitate change to create whatever we want. during his workshops, Dr Joe provides various examples of how people who have attended his events around the globe who have cured themselves of illnesses and diseases such as cancers, physical and neurological conditions to name but a few. Dr Joe also talks about the ongoing research he is conducting on his students and much of his background study is researching those who have made spontaneous remissions.
Dr Joe is of the view we can literally be who we want to be. But to enable ourselves to do this, we need to shed our old selves. So in order to ‘break the habit of being yourself’, you need to signal new genes to create coherence. Let me expand what I mean by this. Most of us whether we realise is or not are living by the hormones of stress. We are literally in survival mode much of the time. This was extremely adaptive behaviour for our ancestors, the cavemen who had to constantly fight danger or be on high alert to survive. There was the constant need to hunt for food or being ready to fight a sabre tooth tiger.
So at an evolutional level, we are designed, predisposed and evolved to deal with stressful (dangerous and life threatening) situations. In such cases our bodies are very powerful fight or flight producing machines. So in such an eventuality all our stress hormones go into overdrive. Adrenaline and cortisol flush through the body’s system, blood rushes to the extremities to enable us to fight and use all our energy or to run as fast as we can. This is all highly complex stuff and was adaptive back then, in order to prepare us in times of danger. In the present day it is very rare that we are faced with these situations as our predecessors were.
In todays society however we produce those same stress hormones whenever we are in a state of stress, or even when we are just thinking about it. An example would be if you are mulling over and over what to say to a work colleague after a dispute the day previously. Or after having a big argument with your partner. You still experience the same emotions and feelings as if you are still actually in that situation right there.
Continued production of stress hormones over a prolonged period of time is highly maladaptive behaviour. Don’t get me wrong, a certain level of stress is needed in certain situations. This is vital and it enables us to function to our optimum ability. However when we are constantly living by the hormones of stress, we are headed for disease, illness or other related problems. We we don’t realise is that as we think the same thoughts this leads to the same choices to the same behaviours to the same experiences which leads to the same emotions which then returns us to the same thoughts. We are effectively conditioning the body to become the mind. This is great for certain automatic programmes and habits that we might create in order to serve us well for example driving, or walking or talking.
However its not so effective when we condition our body by negative thoughts that then lead to the same negative feelings. We then become conditioned to negative emotions such as those of worry, fear, guilt, anxiety, resentment and judgment. Old emotions are a record of the past so we are literally living in the past. How can we then create a new future while we are living in the past! We may say the past defines who we but we are using situation right now to reaffirm our addictions to past emotions “Oh I’ve not got enough likes on Facebook today”, “nobody loves me”, “its hard to change”, you get the picture. These are all just old beliefs, non of which are true, but it is easier to reinforce as this is the familiar, as its who we are.
In essence our personality then becomes our personal reality.
The good news is we can change and I see transformational changes in the work that I do on a regular basis. If it was easy everyone would be doing it right? Firstly its important to become more conscious of the same thoughts and feelings. Much of this stuff is automatic, a subconscious programme if you will. So become more aware of those negative thoughts. Recognise moment to moment how you are feeling, rather than letting those thoughts pass you by on a subconscious level (most of the time we are that conditioned we don’t even realise we are doing the thinking).
The more we can live by the feelings of gratitude and joy the more positives we will notice in our lives. Be in the now. Live moment to moment and be present. As soon as we are experiencing worry and anxiety, we are right back in the past and the moment we experience fear we are constructing a false future that isn’t even true yet.
If you would like to know more about how I can help you transform your own life, don’t hesitate to get in touch. For more information check out some recent testimonials on my website:
Until next time geniuses!
Janine can be booked for workshops in the corporate sector. For more information or to book Janine, please contact her on the form below
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